The recent debacle that has made
international news is about feminists who have come to the Kotel (the Western
Wall) in Jerusalem to “liberate the wall (as they put it).” What they wish to accomplish is not so
evident since they have a very hidden agenda.
What the absolute truth is about what they are doing, what it will mean
to them, to Israel and to all women around the world, needs discussion. The one question that I always like to ask is
“what is Hashem’s opinion?”
To begin, I would like to repost an
essay (with changes) that I did 1 May 2012, that should give insight into Hashem’s opinion. The essay was entitled:
Sexism in Scriptures and in Life
One subject that I have found to be a big myth is the stigma of women in the observant community. The secular world is convinced that women are treated as subservient citizens, and it is all because the Bible (which most people believe was written by men) treats them as such. I had the exact same belief before I became observant since I had only lived in secular communities (about 48 years worth) which perpetuated that stereotype. I didn’t know any observant Jews and could only believe what I had heard about them. Then three things happened in my life. One was discovering the truth about who wrote scriptures; second, was a deeper analysis of what scriptures really says; and third, was moving into an observant Torah community, meeting these wonderful people and experiencing the exact opposite of what I was led to believe.
First of all, let us review what it says in
scriptures. The most amazing thing that I discovered was it is very one
sided, but against men not women. “Women are at a higher spiritual level
than men could ever be.” What is the basis for that statement?
Because women can experience life in them and men can’t. It is the
primary reason that women are not obligated to fulfill many of the
commandments. Women are above the need for many commandments. We
see throughout scriptures that the women are more righteous than the men.
The original sin, as I had discussed earlier, was mostly due to Adam not
repenting his mistake. We have additional insight into how a wife should
assist her husband. Hashem separated Adam and Eve and said that she
should be “ezer kenegdo,” a helper parallel to him (Genesis 2:18). This
has an interesting connotation that in English we stress the first word a
“helper” almost making her sound like a servant to him. More accurately,
the second word “parallel” or, I have even seen it translated as “against”
him. This makes her totally equal a partner who should even keep him
straight when he makes mistakes. She is there, not to serve him, but to
work together on an equal basis and maybe even keep him out of trouble. Observant
men study and work hard all their lives to try to reach a spiritual level that
women have already. The man will never
achieve that level, but should always be grateful to the women in his life who
help him with the effort. Maybe, because
men and women are not equal is why we call our wives “our better half
(literally).”
We are told that Sarah was more of a prophetess than
Abraham being a prophet. Isaac was not aware of the deception of
his son Esau but Rivka was able to help Jacob achieve the birthright and
perpetuate the will of Hashem. Both Rachel and Leah were very wise and of
great help to Jacob. When the father of Moses, Amram, a leader in the
community, decided to prevent further killings of the Jewish male babies, he
required the men to divorce their wives. It was the wisdom and foresight of his
daughter Miriam that changed his mind. As a result of the prophecy that Miriam
experienced, her brother, Moses was born -- the deliverer of the Jew
people. Shifra and Puah (who were really Yocheved and Miriam) acted as
midwives and saved many Jewish babies. The greatness of Queen Esther in
her role that saved the Jews in Persia (the celebration of Purim) or
Jehudit the one whose bravery helped save the Jews (the celebration of
Chanukah) or the greatness of Chanah, Chulda, Ruth, Michal, etc (I know the list is far more extensive, I apologize if I left out your favorite). The fact that
the women were not in favor of building the Golden Calf or that they did not
believe the negative reports of the spies are very indicative of the much
higher spiritual level that women have throughout history. Many are not
aware that because ten of the spies did come back with a negative report and
the fact that the men didn't have the high level of faith and trust in Hashem
as the women did, there were two punishments that resulted. One is that
the Israelites would have to remain in the desert for 40 years, one year for each
day that the spies were away; the other is that from that time on when men pray
they will require a quorum of ten men in order to bring down the Shechinah, the divine presence of Hashem, one man for each
negative spy. Never think that women cannot be counted as part of a
minion is a sexist or prejudicial act. It is that women are at the higher
level and don’t require this punishment of ten in order to pray to
Hashem. Women should never lower themselves to the level of men by
wanting to be counted in the minion. (It’s interesting that this
spirit of Hashem, Shechinah, is a feminine word, which negates the poor English
translation of Hashem as He. Hashem is neither a He nor She. But,
the different qualities of His essence are considered masculine or feminine and
the words demonstrate those qualities for which men and women are individually
blessed).
You get the idea. The roles that women played and
tremendous sacrifice that we see throughout scriptures is very much in favor of
the Jewish woman and not men. One incident in Torah that shows the
weakness of men is when the righteous Joseph was confronted by the wife of
Potifar. Joseph was said to be a very handsome man that the women swooned
over. When he was made a servant in the house of Potifar, the captain of
the palace guards, Potifar’s wife made a play for the handsome Joseph.
Joseph knew that men, including him, were not strong and could give into
temptation which caused him to run from the house. Sometimes one passes a
test by running from the situation.
One of the most important roles of the married Jewish
couple is to “be fruitful and multiply.” Bringing new Jewish souls into
the world is a very prominent factor in the process of perfecting the
world. The world will not be perfected until all the Jewish souls in
Heaven have come to Earth and have been rectified individually (this is much
more involved than what I am saying here). The woman takes on the very
important role of teacher of life within a household. Her nurturing of
the children is the greatest element for the success of the family and in turn
the entire Jewish community. The training of Jewish children to become
righteous adults can be attributed to the high level of righteousness of the
Jewish woman. What I have experienced is that Jewish men hold their wives
in high regard since most households are very successful in bringing to
fruition the will of Hashem (mostly due to the women).
There is another great misunderstanding in the customs of
the observant community -- the separation of men and women in prayer
service. As demonstrated in the story of Joseph, men are weak. When
you have a situation such a prayer that requires complete concentration, and
not lip service to perform it properly, no man could ever convince me that he
can handle the great spiritual involvement with a woman in his site. I’ve
said it before; any man that tells me he can handle it is either a liar or a
homosexual. There are other hidden factors in the separation of men and
women. One is Hashem wishes no individual to be embarrassed. When
men and women sit together it becomes obvious if you see a single man or a
single women sitting alone. People gossip. They look at the
individual, especially if the person is older and wonder why that person
doesn’t have a spouse. We eliminate any possibility of embarrassment by
having men sit with men and women sitting with women. Another
embarrassment is that no individual should touch a Torah if he or she is
ritually impure (this would require much explanation as to what impurity means
– but whatever you think it is, is probably incorrect since it is a spiritual
matter not physical). The time of the monthly cycle renders a woman
impure. If a woman was in seat in the synagogue that she could reach the
Torah or could be asked, as the men are, to take the Torah out of the Ark,
it would be an embarrassment if the woman declined or shied away from the Torah
and everyone suspected the reason. There
are many things within Jewish ritual that occur to avoid embarrassment; but,
unfortunately, they are very unknown and subtle concepts that are
misinterpreted as sexist (men made it up, not Hashem is the going thought).
It is fascinating to know that for thousands of years men
and women were always separated in prayer service even in the church.
When the enlightenment came in the mid 1800s the church so-called modernized
and combined the sexes. The Jewish Reform movement, which mimicked the
church in most of its customs, decided to join in and modernize – completely ignoring
Hashem’s detailed instructions about men and women being separate. This is the only reason the so-called modern
Jewish movements have combined seating. It is not the will of Hashem.
From the
book “Tefillin” by Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan z”tl
Tefillin are a most wonderful way to bind oneself to
Hashem. But, it is only for men. Where do women come in? On a most simple level, the reason
for the commandments is to establish a link with Hashem. The most profound way to do this is to resemble Him. There is one unique way that women resemble Hashem in a way that no man could ever hope to.
Only a woman can create within her body.
Only a woman can bear a child. In this sense, a woman partakes
of Hashem’s attributes more intimately than any man. The Kabbalists teach us that the hand Tefillin
represent the feminine element. The single
hollow can be said to represent the womb, and the coils, the umbilical cord. What
man partakes of with an object, woman partakes of with her very body. The box of Tefillin is called a Bayis –
literally a house. The woman also has her
Bayis – the home in which she raises a family.
One could say that a woman's home is her Tefillin.
There are two basic elements in Judaism, the home and the synagogue.
Judaism treats the home and synagogue as
being co-equal. Some of our most
important rituals belong exclusively to the home, such as the Seder, the Succah,
the Sabbath table, the Sabbath candles, the Chanukah lamp, etc. The continuity of Judaism rests on the home
more than anything else. This Bayis, the
home, is a woman's Tefillin. It is her
contribution to the overall picture of Hashem’s purpose. It is interesting to note that Hashem told
all, from Moses to Jacob, and teach the sons of Israel: “If the Torah does not
enter the Jewish home first, there can be no continuity of Judaism. This spirit of Torah in the Jewish home
(Bayis) is the same as the parchments of Torah in the Tefillin box (Bayis). But this is the domain of the woman.
Additionally, the Tallit or prayer shawl is a reminder to
men to perform the 613 commandments of the Torah. Women do not need this reminder and are
therefore not obligated to wear a Tallit. Woman who would like to wear either a Tallit
or Tefillin are lowering themselves to the level and weaknesses of a man. Let us do things the way Hashem commanded and
not attribute any custom to the arrogance of men or the misconception of
prejudice to women
I probably could never fully articulate the true aspects
of the high attributes of Jewish women – after all, I’m a man, what do I know. But having had a very extensive comparison of
the way women are treated in the secular world to the pedestal treatment they
receive in the Jewish observant world, I can say without reservation that they
are not even close. I have observed such
prejudicial treatment of women in secular life, at school, in the military and
at the workplace. This behavior would
be considered appalling to the observant Jewish community. When people believe that it is the flawed
rules and customs made up by men that we follow instead of the perfect guidance
of Hashem, they are greatly deceived. When they realize that Hashem’s system is
perfect, only then can they also enjoy the happiness that the system of this
world has to offer. The observant Jewish
community has the happiest people in the world with the best behaved children,
the lowest divorce rate, the most successful marriages and by far the greatest
peace of mind. When you follow and trust
Hashem, it is easy. Are we perfect in
following Hashem’s system? Definitely
not, but that is what life is all about – perfecting ourselves so that our
eternal life can be the best. “Be all
that you can be” is not just for the US Army. The truest accomplishment of that motto in the
world is with the observant Jewish community. Don’t argue with success.
What is sad is that a lack of education of the subject
causes one to hinder one’s growth and the important concept of bringing oneself
closer to Hashem. A woman trying to
lower herself to the lever of a man is totally counterproductive and even
harmful in the quest for happiness and a wonderful eternity. Passing that message onto one's children is
extremely sinful, and will cause great damage to that child’s well-being.
With that said we can more intelligently look at what it
means to these women, to Israel and to the women of the world. That will be in part 2, tomorrow, B”N
