Tuesday, July 17, 2012


I received an e-mail this morning that bothered me.  One of my readers has also been experiencing belligerent comments from readers of the website for which he writes.  I have also experienced the same sort of nonsense on blogs that my daughter, son-in-law and friends are involved with.  Although most of my readers I find to be very pleasant, intelligent and a pleasure to know, there are always bad apples that can hurt the rest.  Let me analyze what the real problem is and talk of my true concern for this matter.

It is interesting that the less Torah learning an individual has, the more opinion they use.  Opinion is based on life's experiences and not so much on knowledge.  When I was doing Kiruv in the states, I saw it all the time that you can teach Hashem's opinion on a subject and get as a response:  "I always believed it was this way or that way."  I find the more Torah that I learn, the less I know.  When I discover the truth about a subject, I find I have a lot more to learn and that I have been running on my opinion for years on whatever subject is at hand.  I am experiencing, almost every day, "the me of the past" since most people without Torah answers know much more than I -- they have an opinion.  The biggest problem is, unlike when I was face-to-face with my Kiruv (outreach) student, the web is a cold hard place to correct and help people.  In person, we provide instant help and a much friendlier atmosphere.  People are much more brave and show much more belligerency when they deal long distance by writing.  Since they can say any nonsense they want and even use the name Anonymous to spout their misgivings, they become as brazen as they want without consequence.

Or, is it without consequence.  Anyone who has fear of heaven knows very well that everything they do, every word they say and even every thought they have is known and is recorded in heaven.  Psychologist will tell you that people like to have a scapegoat.  Jews have been the most famous scapegoats in history.  It's very difficult for us to admit our own shortcomings.  If we have a way to vent our frustrations, blame someone else in a way that we think is safe, we take advantage of it.  The web has perpetuated much hatred, especially Jew hatred, because it is a haven for cowards.  It is so easy to blame someone else for ones problems; especially a stranger that I will probably never see or encounter in any way.

This is very much what I experienced last week when there was a debate on another blog.  I saw within the 110 comments, individuals with a great lack of Torah knowledge, screaming for help.  It was a vent for personal problems and frustrations. The big problem was it hurt good people.  I've written recently about Loshan Harah and the permanent damage it could cause. You can’t take it back and can’t fix the damage.  I see on this blog a decrease in comments and a decrease in page views. This indicates to me that many of my readers may have lost confidence in some of the material that I am presenting.  I am getting more personal Emails from people who want to talk but do not want the other readers to read their questions or concerns.  The sad part is that I did not get challenged when points of disagreement were voiced.  Instead of somebody doing it the Torah way by saying to me I disagree with something and here is my evidence to prove my point, I received anger and nonsensicle acusations.  Anger is always a sign of frustration and lack of knowledge on the part of the individual.  I can see that they are not angry at me; but, they just can’t admit it that the psychological failing is on their part.  In other words, they are angry at themselves and are merely looking to vent their frustrations and the safety of the internet is the perfect outlet.

Since I am aware of this, I am in no way concerned about myself but I'm very concerned about those who are having this problem since I cannot help Mr. anonymous.  The biggest frustration of all is how many people listen to Loshan Harah and believe it.  Both are grave sins in the eyes of Hashem – listening and/or believing.  I know that I can control the comments on this blog. I can delete any comment that is inappropriate.  But when it appears on somebody else's blog and as Loshan Harah, that I have no control over.  What the moderator of another blog prints becomes that moderator’s responsibility even if it contains very sinful and damaging rhetoric. Printing Loshan Harah is a way of condoning Loshan Harah. That hurts everyone involved: the one being talked about, the one saying the Loshan Harah, the blogger allowing it and the readers who read it (even if they don’t believe it).  What is sad is that no topic that I have presented and was questioned was debated.  I was just told I was wrong and end of story.  In every case I had excellent sources to prove my arguments. In some cases I had to do further research since it was dealing with something that I had heard many years ago but I was still able to vindicate my position.  The problem was it wasn’t my blog to forum.  I take very seriously the idea of presenting the absolute truth and I spend many hours a day researching and writing before I post.  It's amazing how someone with a total lack of scholarship on the subject can, with a distorted opinion, voice dissension the way they do.  I find almost no one will ever research the subject; only that they comment based on what they have experienced themselves – an opinion.  I know basically people are lazy; but, if they really know how much damage they are doing to themselves and others, they would become more ambitious.  Don’t forget: this is damage for all eternity.

I am with very little concern about myself. I know that everything in this world is for the good.  I see this as testing for myself and for any blogger who faces the same situation.  In other words Hashem is providing me with challenge to help me grow which gives me Tikun.  I thank Hashem for the personal growth, but I still feel bad if any of my readers have been led astray and had their personal growth negatively affected.  Also, I feel bad for the frustrated individual who comments in an incorrect way by not asking questions but just voicing dissention.  Your entire future depends on it as well.  I have mentioned many times that we are getting close to the Day of Judgment "the two late date."  How much I wish everyone would take this seriously.  It's not the anger that you are venting, it is the fact that you may be shooting yourself in the foot while doing it.  Other bloggers should note that taking the Absolute Truth off of your favorites list has sent a very strong message to your readers and mine.  It condones Loshan Harah and hatred.  It says that judging a fellow Jew without reviewing who is doing things the way Hashem wants and who is being inconsiderate of one's fellow Jew, is not important.  Are you seeking the truth or just giving in to the loudest protesters to appease them?  Fairness is the Torah way and is the best lesson for your readers.  Your eternity will be reviewed on Judgment Day; do the right thing.

I have a love for all people and those who can't control their own emotions, I wish to help. I am neither a hateful person nor a vengeful person, but only one who wants to do the will of Hashem and help everyone.  If you lack knowledge on the subject that I am covering, then join me in learning.  If you know more than I on any subject and wish to contribute, I'd like to consider myself as open-minded an individual as can be and I am ready to learn from you.  All I ask is be nice to me and my readers and any other blogger to whom you provide comments.  I am sure you will receive niceness in return, especially from Hashem.  That's the Torah way; and, that's what makes Hashem happy.


  1. king david was not nice in torah when he confronted sheker. rather he was an ish milchama. try printing torah and all comments, and maybe you wont have decrease. turn ur blog into a torah blog and not a rav menachem look at my opinion blog.

    1. You Mr Anonymous are exactly why I wrote this post. I defy you to give me one example in over 200 pages that I have written that is not Torah. By the way, when I see someone not capitalizing King David or Torah, I know that I am dealing with a very uneducated, non-Torah person (I don't even have a clue if you are Jewish or not. Anonymous doesn't sound Jewish.) You are in a lot of trouble and if you want to continue with lies about others like this, you have thrown away your eternity. That is what my blog is all about. I'll be waiting for your reply on one, just one example of a non-Torah post that I made. If your goal is Jew hatred by poisoning my fine readers with you evil rhetoric, may Hashem have pity on your nefesh (you have yet to prove that you have a neshamah). I'm sorry if I confused you with the truth.

  2. Just so you know, I happily still recommend your blog to people I know. I think you have an honest quality that is rare as well as a "tell it like it is" persona.... So my friend please continue...

  3. Menachem , I find your blog to be very informative , you put out this blog לשם שמים , and those few rotten Apples could be remedied
    with some of the spice you generously use in this blog , so just keep doing what you do best , and never mind the rest Hashem will take care of that .